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AFL Announces Quarantine Hub Location

Tony Braxton-Hicks

There are no stupid ideas, just stupid people
Aug 10, 2004
12,143
7,761
The Playboy Mansion
AFL Announces Quarantine Hub Location
By Karen-Tina Hubble for spittle.com

The AFL has announced plans to complete the 2020 season by playing games in a quarantine hub established on the Moon.

“Not only is the Moon coronavirus-free, it is a lifeless, soulless environment like every other place we’ve tried to transplant AFL games,” said AFL Director of Stupid Ideas, Steve Hocking. “It will bring all the excitement of playing a game in China. In fact, it’s the Chinese who are building the hub.”

Hocking admitted that establishing an AFL presence on the Moon will present its own unique challenges. “For instance, players’ apparel will need to be adapted to incorporate spacesuit technology, but we’re supportive of any innovations that require fans to purchase even more overpriced merchandising *smile*.”

Geelong coach Chris Scott said he was outraged that the Moon had been preferred over Kardinia Park as a quarantine hub. “Geelong also has no atmosphere or the resources required to support intelligent life,” he said. “But unlike the Moon, in Geelong everyone can hear me scream.”

Victoria’s Chief Health Officer, Professor Brett Sutton, said that Geelong was a natural quarantine zone as “no one willingly goes there, and the coronavirus has not jumped species into Geelong’s subhuman population. The only risk the feral population poses to humans remains mugging.”

Geelong spokesbogan Patrick Dangerfield added, ‘Look at me. Everybody look at me. I’m great,” before falling down and pretending to have the virus.
 
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frickenel

Tiger Champion
Jul 30, 2003
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Maybe we should have a dedicated thread called The Punt Road Post (or whatever) where TBH and others can post gold like this.
 

AngryAnt

Tiger Legend
Nov 25, 2004
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The moon-hub idea is no more or less realistic than the actual AFL proposal.
 
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Baloo

Delisted Free Agent
Nov 8, 2005
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They'd need plenty of * next to all the records broken on the moon. Longest kick/goal, Mark of the Year etc etc
 
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zippadeee

Tiger Legend
Oct 8, 2004
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The kid Eliah Taylor from Sydney has been suspended for the rest of the season for breaking Covid restrictions guidelines.
And the swannies have copped a 50k fine too.
That's fine.

What did Buckley cop again??

Maybe the AFL knew what they were doing keeping him in the coaches box was a bigger punishment for the club. :rotfl1
 

zippadeee

Tiger Legend
Oct 8, 2004
39,639
15,415
I think if you read the story and see what he did you'll understand the difference in penalties. He has actually broken the state rules re quarantine by sneaking someone in, not just the AFL guidelines.

I just read the breaking news banner going across 501 on foxsports.
Wasn't Nobottom's offence worse.
He went to howe"s joint and then meant up with Wells.
He only copped 4 weeks.
If he did that today. He would cop a 12 week suspension
 

mrposhman

Tiger Legend
Oct 6, 2013
17,856
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The fact that he sneaked her in suggests he knew full well that he was breaking the regulations.

With all the others there is some element of people making mistakes without realising initially, ignorance if you will.

What Taylor did suggests it was more than ignorance and deliberate hence why he received a worse penalty.
 
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22nd Man

Tiger Legend
Aug 29, 2011
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The fact that he sneaked her in suggests he knew full well that he was breaking the regulations.

With all the others there is some element of people making mistakes without realising initially, ignorance if you will.

What Taylor did suggests it was more than ignorance and deliberate hence why he received a worse penalty.
Waiting on Eddie to determine the final penalty.