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Dan is dead

LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne
OK, this thread is firmly tongue-in-cheek. Sort of.

I refer of course to our beloved premier Daniel Andrews who has not been sighted in public since his nasty ****ing-up fall some months ago. All we have as evidence that poor Dan is on the mend are some odd-looking photos and a couple of written statements.

Post all updates, anecdotes, half-truths, rumours, lies, wellwishes and other wishes concerning Dear Dan here.
 

LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne

Premier Daniel Andrews’ return still uncertain after horror fall (paywalled)​

Mitch Clarke
Herald Sun
June 1, 2021

Premier Daniel Andrews is getting daily briefings from his deputy James Merlino while on sick leave, with no greater clarity on when he will return.

In his last public statement on April 18, Mr Andrews, who suffered severe back injuries when he fell down steps, flagged a possible return to work in June.

“The good news is my team of specialists are confident that I will be back in June,” he wrote at the time.

But on the first day of the month, the government kept tight-lipped as to exactly where he was at in his lengthy recovery.

“Today is the first day of June and I’m pretty sure it goes for a few more weeks yet,” Health Minister Martin Foley said on Tuesday.

“He’ll come back in accordance with his medical treatment.”

Mr Foley said the Premier was being briefed on the big issues, but wasn’t actively involved in day-to-day activities.

“There are millions of daily decisions made across government and the Premier is not making those decisions. The Acting Premier is in charge and is in close consultation with the Premier,” he added.

When asked if he thought Mr Andrews should have released a statement during Victoria’s fourth lockdown, Mr Foley said: “His focus is on recovery.”

Opposition leader Michael O’Brien said: “I have wished Daniel a speedy return to work after his fall, once his doctor gives the all clear.

“But regardless of who is in the chair, the same Labor mistakes are being made – suffocating lockdowns and no plan for Victoria’s economic recovery.”
 

MD Jazz

Tiger Legend
Feb 3, 2017
6,845
4,033
Found him
 

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Tigers of Old

Proud of our Club.
Jul 26, 2004
68,560
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www.redbubble.com
I can tell you one thing I don't like Scott Morrison but if he fell down the stairs & had a serious injury I wouldn't mock him. That says plenty about anyone who does.
 
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LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne
Bit sick this thread Lee.
Just a take-off of the famous "Paul is dead" urban legend from the 60's concerning Paul McCartney.

C'mon, have some fun. Dan's dead now, he can't hurt you!

220px-GreatHoax.jpg
 

Streak

Tiger Legend
Aug 31, 2007
35,322
2,437
Western Australia
Personally I reckon he has done a Harry Holt and slipped away on a submarine.

A shame really. Clearly had the track record to be next President of Collingwood footy club.
 
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LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne
March 9

Andrews said he hoped to provide an update on his condition later in the week. His deputy, James Merlino, will be acting premier for the next few days.

Merlino earlier on Tuesday confirmed at a press conference north-east of Melbourne that Andrews had suffered a “nasty fall”.

“Didn’t hit his head, no head injuries, so he’s fine in that respect – just going to hospital for some precautionary X-rays,” he said.

He couldn’t say at that time when Andrews would return to work but repeated that the premier would be fine.

“I expect he’ll be on his feet very shortly, I can’t tell you when exactly that will be, but I know he’s fine and he’s getting some good care as a precaution.”

 
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LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
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Melbourne
April 15

Asked if the premier would return to work as planned in 10 days, Merlino replied: “He’ll come back when his doctors say he’s able to come back”.

“Over the next couple of weeks, he’ll get advice from his doctors in terms of when it’s appropriate to return, but they’re pleased with his recovery.

Earlier this month, Andrews took to social media to wish Victorians a happy Easter and provide an update on his recovery.

“I’m making steady progress and being diligent with my physio exercises,” he said.

“Also building up my walking and am up to about 18 minutes on my daily walk.”

 

eZyT

Tiger Legend
Jun 28, 2019
15,917
12,391
Id imagine he's become overwhelmed and disheartened by the task of trying to govern gormless, unstable, hypocrites.

whose whinging and whining and blaming and vilifications are amplified under the anonymity of the internet,

all while failing to do their civic duty to society and get vaccinated in actual real life, when the opportunity presents.

super trash thread which should be binned
 
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Baloo

Delisted Free Agent
Nov 8, 2005
39,548
9,774
All good. When Dan re-aappears it will have to be a Jesus like resurrection. If that's not proof Dan is Victoria's Saviour then I don't know what is.
 
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LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne
whose whinging and whining and blaming and vilifications are amplified under the anonymity of the internet,
Agree that Dan's disciples are responsible for the lion's share of the whinging around here.

Just trying to lighten the mood a little as Dan's recuperation stretches from days to weeks to months. Clearly all is not well with Supreme Leader.
 

Baloo

Delisted Free Agent
Nov 8, 2005
39,548
9,774
Agree that Dan's disciples are responsible for the lion's share of the whinging around here.

Just trying to lighten the mood a little as Dan's recuperation stretches from days to weeks to months. Clearly all is not well with Supreme Leader.
You know, when you have no risk of losing your job because there's no competition for it, you can afford to relax a bit longer. If Vic opposition had even a skidmark of credibility, Dan might be forced to come back quicker. But they don't, so he doesn't.
 

LeeToRainesToRoach

Tiger Legend
Jun 4, 2006
31,607
9,516
Melbourne
You know, when you have no risk of losing your job because there's no competition for it, you can afford to relax a bit longer. If Vic opposition had even a skidmark of credibility, Dan might be forced to come back quicker. But they don't, so he doesn't.
There's the small matter of an election in November, only five months away. Perhaps we'll be treated to Dan waving to the cheering masses from the top of Parliament House steps, Weekend at Bernie's style. He doesn't need to say anything to retain the support of the faithful.
 

Baloo

Delisted Free Agent
Nov 8, 2005
39,548
9,774
There's the small matter of an election in November, only five months away. Perhaps we'll be treated to Dan waving to the cheering masses from the top of Parliament House steps, Weekend at Bernie's style. He doesn't need to say anything to retain the support of the faithful.

Dan could stay hidden in recovery and still win the next election with the current state of the opposition.
 

TrialByVideo

HailBGale!
Mar 1, 2015
2,723
4,310
I heard he's held up in one of Lindsay's panic rooms.... he's got wall to wall vision of all his potential opponents offices making sure there's no active plot against him.

Lindsay dials in to tell him what contract he wants next to 'save' Victoria and where he's been known to encourage a further stretching of his Sorrento/Portsea property boundary to 3k into the bay.

In his spare time he's scouring Lindsay's vast Victorian landholdings for the best value quarantine station... best value for Lindsay of course!
 
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